Beauty from Ashes

After an extremely emotional day yesterday, I'm so thankful for this Bible Study. 

Isaish 63:3
To those who have sorrow in Zion I will give them a crown of beauty instead of ashes. I will give them the oil of joy instead of sorrow, and a spirit of praise instead of a spirit of no hope. Then they will be called oaks that are right with God, planted by the Lord, that He may be honored.

The Bible says He will give us beauty from ashes.
Scriptures say He will take your difficult, disgusting, depressing and horrible situation and give you beauty.  He will pick you up out of the ash pile of life and make something beautiful out of you.

God knew that we would be burnt by life's experiences. But He also knew He could replace that burnt out mess with something beautiful.

Something beautiful Something good
All my confusion Jesus understood
All I have to offer Him is brokenness and strife
But He made something beautiful out of my life

Ecclesiastes 3:11
He hath made everything beautiful in His time

Zechariah 13:9
I will put into the fire, I will refine them like silver, and test them like gold.  They will call on my name and I will answer them. I will say "they are my people" and they will say "The Lord is our God".

As followers of Christ He is refining us through the fire and making ashes.  I have to take comfort in knowing that God's story never ends with ashes.

Praying right now that God specifically turns Cambree's ashes into beauty. That He will give her a spirit of joy instead of no hope, turn her difficult, depressing and horrible past into beauty.

Make something beautiful of her life.

Orphanage Visit

Day Three
The Orphanage visit and her finding spot

Today was the hardest day so far.  There have been lots of tears....from everyone.  She has great times and then there are those moments....or tonight those hours of uncontrollable screaming.  My heart breaks to see her in so much pain and she will not let you touch her or console her at all. 
Today we had an opportunity to see into Cambree's past.  When you see where she came from you can understand the fear.....insecurities....and.......brokeness.

Our first stop was her finding spot.  The spot where her mom dropped her off and abandoned her.  This is a really nice hotel in the city.  The local newspaper from that day read that she was left on the front sidwalk going into this hotel.

 

After Cambree was found on the sidewalk, she was taken to the local orphanage which was Kunming City Children's Welfare Institute.  I had so much mixed emotions on whether we should visit.  I'm so thankful that we did. 

 

 

 







As we walked back down those same halls where she lived, the ladies called out her name.  We saw the room where she stayed while there.

 





The babies were precious.  Some so tiny. I am so thankful that her time spent there was limited.  Although the facility was beautiful and the ladies all so sweet, I am thankful that she was with a foster nanny that could give more love and attention.

So today we stood on the steps of the facility for one last picture of the orphanage as we said our goodbyes.

 We are thankful for the local people of Kunming for finding her, thankful for the orphanage workers for providing for her and thankful for a nanny to love her until our arrival.  Today we are thankful for one more smile from our beautiful baby girl.

Signed, Sealed Delivered - She's Ours!

Day Two with Cambree.

Signed...Sealed....Delivered....She's Ours!

Today we got up early and headed back to the Civil Affairs office where we met Cambree yesterday.  This is the same couch we found her on less than 12 hours ago. After a bath....after a change of clothes...lots of cherrios and puffs....and a hairbow!

As we started the final paperwork, the director said this is very serious.  You must understand that there is no turning back if you sign these papers.  Then she ask me the worse question I have ever heard..."would you like to give her back to the orphanage director today or do you want to keep her"?  Are you serious??  Please, where do I sign to get this thing finalized??

So, we quickly signed the paperwork and sealed it with her foot print in red ink.

 

 

 

Look at those little fat feet!  Love it.

 



We finally got a sweet smile that made our heart rejoice!

Gotcha Day!

Day one
Gotcha Day!

This morning I woke up as a mom to two wonderful babies. However within a few hours I would be a mom of three.
As we sat there and waited I'm was overcome with excitement and anxiety. I cannot believe we finally get to meet her today. Our appointment at the Civil Affairs office was not until 3:00 pm. So all day we just had to wait.... Wait... And watch the clock.
Finally it was time. We made the 30 minute trip in the worst traffic ever. As we finally entered the building I heard a baby screaming.
There she was Wu, Guo Yun.
So things started off a little rocky.....

Then I introduced her to puffs! She likes to eat about 5000 times per day so this made her very happy.

Then she met the love of her life Baba ( daddy) and would rather I leave her alone. Don't worry I'm winning over her heart with snacks!

So after the whirlwind of paperwork was over the lades turned her over to us. These ladies were from the Kunming City Orphanage and one was the director.

We finally get to leave the Civil Affairs office. 

So after a long hard day we took a bath and headed off for bed.

Today this little angel,started off as Wu, Guo Yun belonging to the Kunming City Orphanage......and now goes to bed tonight as Cambree Jade Condra belonging to her forever family.

China here we come

After over a year of paperwork it is finally time to go pick up our daughter. I'm freaking out a little!!

I have packed everything but the kitchen sink, cried all the tears you can imagine, have more sticky notes around here than Office Depot has in stock, and checked off my to do list a million times.  It is time to leave for China!
Tonight was the last night that our little family of 4 will have dinner together again. The next time we are together we will have our new addition.

So, tomorrow is the big day.  The day I must step out of my comfort zone.  I have never left my kids before longer than a hot second.  I have never been away from home this long before.  I have never been on a plane this long before.  Oh and my word.....I so hate to fly. Praying my plane doesn't just fall out of the sky (because that happens every day).  I pray my medication works or poor Chad might ask to be moved to another seat.....or ask for me to be put in with the baggage.

I have thought so much about what that first day will be like when she is placed in our arms.  I can only imagine how scared she will be. That completely kills me!  Leaving the only people she has ever known, her culture, her language, her home.  She is going to be thrown into the arms of a stranger.  I'm sure she will be thinking - who are these fat white people.  I ask Chad if I should do spray tan tonight so maybe it would take off the glow of white..ness.  He reminded me that the blonde hair will still be enough to scare her to death.  So, I decided against the spray tan.  Not only would she think her mom smelled terrible....with orange crusty ankles but in a few days she would think a new mom arrived when the tan wore off.  So, I pray she likes me!  White....blonde hair...blue eyes and cannot speak a lick of Chinese!

Last post from the USA!  Hopefully I can post in a few days with a little miracle in my arms.

 

Official Travel Approval Has Arrived!!

The moment we have been waiting for has finally arrived. We have officially received word that we are approved to come pick up our daughter!
The sweetest part of the letter says “we have agreed that this child who is in the care of Kunming City Children’s Welfare Inst be place with you for adoption. Please travel in person with this notice to proceed”. Rip my heart out!

Exactly one year, and three weeks ago today we started our adoption process. Now here we are at the end of the journey, but it’s really just the beginning.
We will leave Atlanta on March 22^nd to begin the LONG journey to the other side of the world. I’m really not sure if there is enough medication that can be given to get my on a flight for that long…..but I know that God didn’t bring me this far to let me go now. Then, on March 25^th we get to pick up this sweet baby! After receiving these updated photos, I’m pretty sure I could swim to China and get her tonight.

We stay in her city of Kunming China until Friday, March 29^th to finalize her adoption. We will then leave for Guangzhou China, where on April 2^nd we have an appointment to meet with the US Consulate to receive her VISA. Then on April 4^th we will begin the LONG journey back home.
Now it’s time to freak out a little! I’ve already mentioned I don’t fly very well. The next big problem is I have never been away from my kids more than a hot second. My heart is breaking thinking about leaving them for that long. I know that they will be in great hands, but not MY hands. Pray for Nana and Mimi as they take care of them for so long. Pray they get rested up now…. and bring their tennie shoes….and maybe some benedryl for bedtime.
I am completely a procrasinator. I haven’t even started packing yet and getting ready so the next 2 weeks I’m going to be on crazy lady mode. Time to get things ready!

Things are starting to move!

Each time I go to Kroger I feel like I always get in the slowest moving line.  This past year that is how things have seemed.  I have felt like we were trying to get to China in a very small boat across the ocean.

Nothing really moves fast in the adoption world.

However, the past few weeks things have started to move.  I guess we have traded in the kayak and got a faster moving model.

There is light at the end of this long tunnel.

This week we received word that our last immigration paperwork had been approved.  For those of you who have lost count, yes that is about step number 4856 million....however, we are only about 3 more steps away.  This paperwork we just received was our petition to classify her as an immediate relative and get this little Chinese wonton into the USA.  Our steps left are for our paperwork to go to the National Visa Center, then onto the US Embassy in China so the adoption can be completed, schedule a few appointment there in China, then wait for the long awaited news that we can come get her. So, yes things are starting to pick up. 

On another note.....as things get closer I realize that Cambree Jade is for real.  Don't get me wrong...yes I know she has been "for real" a long time, but when you have a picture to match your dream and it almost time to go meet your daughter a whole new level of fear begins.....and a prescription of zantac is needed.  Since we received her file I knew that she was from Kunming China and the Kunming City Children's Welfare Institution. 

Doesn't it look beautiful!!!!!!  Well, guess what she isn't there.

So, over the past few months I have been on every website, blog, and adoption group forum that you could imagine.  I ran across a wonderful lady named Julie who was traveling with her family to Kunming to adopt their daughter this week.  And the best part was their daughter was from the exact same orphanage as Cambree.  Of course I emailed her to say "please see if you can see/get a picture/get any information you can on my baby!  I gave her Cambree's Chinese name, birthday and the only photo I had which was taken at 9 months old.  As if Julie didn't have enough going on she was happy to see what she could find out.  Today she and her family was able to tour the orphanage.  She was able to see the infant room and meet a few of the ladies who worked with the babies.  She ask about Cambree and although they knew exactly who she was, we learned that she was not living there at the orphanage.  Cambree is currently living with a foster family away from the center.  She will remain with them until a week before our arrival.  At that time they will bring her back to the center for one week to wait for us to arrive - can you say "rip my heart out".  That is the worst plan I've ever heard of.  She will be an emotional hot mess!  My heart hurts for her just thinking about that process.

As I called my friend tonight to share a few......tears....she reminded me of something special.  Our baby is getting some individual love, and care, hugs and kisses and will know what love is all about.  So, tonight I pray for this very special foster family that is taking care of my child. This Chinese nanny who is the only Mama that Cambree Jade has ever had.  I pray that she is giving her all the love and nurture that she can until our arrival.
Isn't that amazing that God placed Julie in my path to get updated information on Cambree.  How cool is that!